Best friend funny quotes and sayings

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  • Press down if you think you are mad.  I can’t believe you did tat! Again? For god sake! Lord!! Why you still doing it? Truth is out now! Mental case
  • Sometimes, my mind asks. Why I miss You? Why I care for you? Why I remember you? why I text u? Then my heart answered, mongoloids need more care! Hehehe. u are smiling
  • Congrats.  Your phone has been installed with a new puzzle game.  To play, throw your phone against the wall. then assemble the pieces. . . .
  • I have had a really bad day and it always makes me feel better to see a pretty girl smile. so,  would you smile for me?
  • Taste this sms did you feel the taste of ginger? No? Sure? Well. . . .  Monkey couldn’t taste it well
  • Height of illiteracy: you take a blade write your lovers name on your arm.  And make a spelling mistake
  • Impact of movies: teacher: Who is mahatma Gandhi? Student: he is the one who helped munna bhai to impress his girlfriend
  • 100 words don't give pain but, a true friends silence hurts a lot. Especially in the exam hall.
  • Teacher: Why are you late? Student: my dad told me to take our cow to bull. Teacher(angrily): cant your dad to it? Student: Only bull can do it
  • How to keep an idiot entertained press down, how to keep an idiot entertained press up
  • Hello, this is god. I make few bad creations but you are the worst monster I ever realized. my apologies on behalf of the whole world. .
  • After finishing mbbs, muna bai start his practice.  Checked 1st patient eyes, tongue and ears by torch, finally what did he say?  Battery is ok
  • Hi, doing nothing? Then make a place, for me in your heart!! I may com there ne time! Yours faithfully,   heart attack
  • Way to propose a girl.  Take her to sea; say her to sit in a boat.  Then take the boat in the middle of sea.  Say marry me are leave my boat
  • Gals are like phones. They love to be held, talked to but if you press the wrong button, u will be disconnected
  • Ajay: Why were you wearing sunglasses in the night? Vijay: I was late for home and wanted to keep my wife in the dark.
  • Some things are made for each other. For example, shoe and socks, soap and water, paper and pen, me and your girl friend.
  • Your girl friends are smart, intelligent, sweet, talented, excellent, and romantic.  In short, she is your sister.
  • Man: how old is your dad? Boy: as old as me.  Man: how can that be? Boy: he became a father Only when I was born. .
  • Mom: have you brought the matches home? Son: s! Mum: are they working? Son: Yes! I have tried up all the fire matches. its working.
  • Dad: a sincere traffic police was suspended 4rm his job.  Son: y? Dad: cos he charged the ambulance for over speed.
  • If you have a talent, and you have the skill, and you want to do, something for others den don't waste your time, join Bombay circus as a joker
  • The human brain is a most outstanding thing. It functions to4hrs 365 days. .  It functions ri8 4rm the time you are born. .  Until you fall in love
  • Love is like a cigar it starts with a fire. Continues with smoke and ends in ashes. But don't worry. We are chain smokers
  • Hi Katrina here I love you so much please if you got this sms give me a miss call on this no. 999to10. . 1to at about 6pm I love you sweet heart
  • This message was sent exclusively to the hansom and the beautiful guy.  We have obviously sent it to the wrong num. We are truly sorry for the inconvenience.
  • I look at the moon, the moon is beautiful. I look at you. I would rather look at the moon again.
  • I love  you , I love  you , I love  you , I love  you , I love  you , I love  you , I love  you . hey! Don't get excited, I love other alphabets to. . v, w, x, y, z
  • A gal phoned me the other day and said. . .  Come on over, there is nobody home.  I went over. Nobody was home
  • This cat is cat a cat good cat way cat to cat keep cat idiot cat busy cat for cat to0 cat seconds cat! Now read it without saying cat!
  • Gal announced her engagement to her dad.  Dad: does this fellow have money? Gal: o! dad, You men are all alike, that is exactly what he asked me about you
  • Why are Egyptian children always confused? Because after death, their daddy becomes a mummy.
  • Joke of the century-once upon a time there was a country that claimed to be a nuclear power but did not have electrical power.
  • Teacher: what is a fine? Student: fine is a tax for doing wrong.  Teacher: and what is tax? Student: a tax is a fine for doing right.
  • Child1: my father has not worked for a day from the last five years.  Child2: why? Child1: because he is a night watchman.
  • If you fall, nobody will care for you.  If you die, nobody will cry for you.  Cause nobody loves you.  Oh by the ways. my name is nobody
  • In an interview for a government job??? Interviewer: what can you do well? Candidate: nothing.  Interviewer: good, you are the right person for this job.
  • When your life is in darkness pray to god ask hi am to free you from darkness and after if you pray and you are still in darkness, then please pay your e bill
  • Madam: last semester you where roaming wit tat girl and this semester your roaming with other what is this? Boy: syllabus changed madam!